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"Weird Al" Yankovic
"Weird Al" Yankovic, released May 3rd, 1983, is "Weird Al" Yankovic's first album, and it's the only album of his to feature the honk of his accordion on every single track. Featuring well known parodies like I Love Rocky Road, My Bologna, and Another One Rides The Bus, as well as fan favorite originals like I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead
Ricky
Parody of Mickey by Toni Basil
Ehhh... I haven't seen any I Love Lucy and I've never listened to the original track, so I have no connection to the song. However, the song is still funny even without such a connection. I Love Lucy is a show that needs little introducition in its concept, so I can grasp it pretty quickly. I also like that the music video is in black-and-white, like the show.
Rating: 7 burnt shirts out of 10
Gotta Boogie
Probably one of my favorite songs on this album. I think the bait and switch with the meaning of "boogie" is funny, and I especially like the "Do you wanna boogie?" part of the track. Al considers it his "most juvenile" song, with "Party At The Leper Colony" closely following behind, but I don't think that a song being juvenile is bad. Is that why nobody wants to listen to the music I like?!
Rating: 9 stubborn flakes of dried nasal mucus out of 10
I Love Rocky Road
Parody of I Love Rock & Roll by Joan Jett & The Blackhearts
Hey, we all like ice cream! Definitely one of the best ice cream themed tracks, but personally I can't say I've ever had rocky road ice cream specifically. Mint chip is fine with me. The music video for this is pretty damn awesome too. Polka Your Eyes Out webmaster Winter said it best when they said "If Joan Jett proved that riot girls could rock, then Weird Al proved that polka geeks could, too."
Rating: 10 gallons of sweet dairy out of 10
Buckingham Blues
Yeah, I don't have much to say on this one. Never cared for the British royal family, wasn't around for Princess Diana, and there are better "Weird Al" Yankovic blues songs. I don't dislike this one, but it's easily the most forgettable track on the album.
Rating: 6 stereotypically British cups o' tea out of 10
Happy Birthday
Oh hell yeah. The contrast of a birthday song against the sense of impending doom that the song could cast upon a child on his 7th birthday makes this an amazing track that I want to play at every birthday party, and it certainly helps that the LP of the album was given to me as a birthday gift. Definitely my favorite song on Side A.
Rating: 10 LPs of "Weird Al" Yankovic's 1983 self-titled album gifted as a birthday gift out of 10
Stop Draggin' My Car Around
Parody of Stop Draggin' My Heart Around by Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
For the longest time, I didn't know this one was a parody. I figured it was an original song-- which it could pass for on this album, where the order of "parody-original-parody-original-polka-parody-original..." hadn't quite been established yet. The lyrics are funny, and I think its hilarious to picture the owner of a disco (who even went to discoes after 1978, anyway?) towing away a car just because it was kinda ugly. I had to look up "schwinn" to find out that it was a brand of bicycle. Additionally, I really like the potential lampshading / foreshadowing of The Check's In The Mail.
Rating: 8 parking tickets out of 10
My Bologna
Parody of My Sharona by The Knack
My Bologna is probably my favorite "Weird Al" Yankovic food song, if not Eat It. It's definitely one of the first Weird Al songs that comes to mind, possibly by virtue of being his very first single. The song itself has memorable lyrics; it's always the first thing to come to mind when I'm eating bologna, and it's got one of Al's best burps to boot-- which the 2022 rerecording (and even the 1979 single/demo) don't really do justice. I even like the fact that it's sung way faster than the '79 bathroom single. Al truly pioneered the nightcore scene.
10 slices of heavily processed lunch meat out of 10
The Check's In The Mail
Another great original from this album! Not as "up there" as the three-song sprint of originals at the end, but it's still great! I enjoyed the bit about the lawyer and his three piece suit, and the concept of someone having a line of people just waiting to sue him is a pretty funny picture.
8 undelivered checks rotting in the post office out of 10
Another One Rides The Bus
Parody of Another One Bites The Dust by Queen
Here it is, the one parody that I'm most familiar with the source material for-- and also, the only one I can't sing the parody lyrics to the original for. What can I say, I had a Queen phase in middle school. As someone who rode the bus last year (I went off-campus for some of my classes), I can confess that I've made an effort to hear this song while I was riding the bus, and... it was an experience. Definitely made the ride that much better.
9 questionable yellow stains on your seat out of 10
I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead
I love this song, and I'd probably love it even more if I'd experienced the yuppie culture that Al was poking fun at here. This song also happens to be my dad's favorite song on this album, so I have to give it points for that. This summer, I actually visited some family in Texas, and we had Jack In The Box one day. After having had both sandwiches, I can confirm that Big Macs and Jumbo Jacks are preferable to Japanese bean sprouts.
8 Jumbo Jacks out of 10
Such A Groovy Guy
We all know a guy like this, probably. I wonder if this is the same guy that was singing in "Stop Draggin' My Car Around"? It's also hilarious to think that this was written about an actual guy-- specifically, the ex-boyfriend of Al's girlfriend at the time. Honestly, I wonder if it's the same woman whose breakup with Al inspired One More Minute? I wonder too much in this part, I think. The whole part about dental floss, chocolate pudding, electrodes, and other weirdly kinky stuff is great, too.
7 pairs of pitch-black sunglasses out of 10
Mr. Frump In The Iron Lung
Mr. Frump In The Iron Lung is a great closer for the album. While it's no Nature Trail To Hell or Albuquerque, it's a great example of Al's black comedy at work, a-la Christmas At Ground Zero or Happy Birthday, and the use of the air valve on the accordion is ingenious. While the song is slowly growing dated as the number of iron lungs in use today dwindles (I believe we've gotten all the way down to just two, last I checked... but we might get more thanks to anti-vaxxers!) the song is still funny... but probably not as funny as it was in a world with three iron lung users. If I ever end up in an iron lung, I want my last name legally changed to Frump.
Conclusion
It's a great album! I wish more albums would have the amount of original tracks that this album has. I certainly don't regret picking it up on the Main Three™©℗®-- that being CD, cassette, and LP.
Rating: 8 music landscape changing debuts out of 10
Formats owned on: CD, cassette, LP